Friday, January 8, 2010

How to Tell If You or Someone You Know is Lazy

What is Laziness



I'm sure everyone thinks they know what being lazy is. I'm sure everyone thinks they know a lazy person when they see one. But, I bet after I finish with this post, you will realize that you had no clue what laziness really is. I will go over the various definitions of lazy. How to recognize someone being secretly lazy. How to admit to yourself that you really are being lazy. How to see the warning signs of what your laziness is causing in your life.



The Definition of Lazy



Dictionary.com defines lazy as:

1. averse or disinclined to work, activity, or exertion; indolent.
2. causing idleness or indolence: a hot, lazy afternoon.
3. slow-moving; sluggish: a lazy stream.
4. (of a livestock brand) placed on its side instead of upright.

This is very funny. Because this is a very lazy definition of the word lazy. Why? Because it is wrong. That is not the definition of lazy. Or, that is not the complete definition of laziness. We go to a dictionary for a complete and accurate definition of a word right? Then, why would a dictionary take it upon themselves to give us and abridged version of the word.

The real definition of the word lazy [in my terms, and I'm very anal about English definitions]:

1. being disposed not to work, exert oneself, participate in physical activity.
2. being disposed to remain idle, not move, or not think for oneself.
3. moving in a slow, sluggish manner.
4. avoiding and shirking one's duties and responsibilities.
5. procrastinating a needed activity while doing another unnecessary activity.

Let's look at number 5, for a second. This is something new that people do not realize they are doing. I will be the first to admit, that I do this, and I do it a lot. By definition then, I am very lazy.

How could this be? How could you do something, and do a lot of it, and yet be lazy, very lazy. Let me explain and it will be clear.

Being lazy is not a question of doing, it is a question of what you are not doing. Let me give you a very real and serious example:

A husband works very long hours. He is making tons of money and is always at the office. Everyone is shocked that his wife up and divorces him.

What happened here? How could he be considered lazy if he was working long hours to provide for his wife? The truth is, he was not working to provide more money for her. He was working long hours to avoid a very necessary and pointed talk they needed to have. Instead of him working on his relationship with his wife, he instead avoided the situation altogether and stayed at the office as much as possible. She then divorced him based on the fact that they had marital problems and he was unwilling to not only resolve them, but avoided even talking about them altogether. He was being lazy about their marriage.

I hate this example, because I never believe in divorce. Or, let me say, I do not believe in divorce aside from infidelity. Infidelity is unforgivable in a marriage. Anything else, can be worked on. That is not to say, marry any fool that comes along, but don't get a divorce because your husband avoids talking to you.

A New Trend in Laziness is Escapism



Just like the husband was avoiding talking to the wife was being lazy, a new trend is emerging that is set to take hold like wildfire. What is this new trend? Video games! You might laugh at this but let me explain.

Escapism, by the definition of laziness above, is a direct interpretation of laziness. You are shirking your duties and responsiblty. I have seen, and it is commonly known, video gamers that play video games so much and for so long that they: do not eat; do not sleep; do not bathe; do not feed their children; do not go to work;do not go on dates. The list goes on and on, all resulting in escapism. The outsider might think playing video games is innocent, or even the gamers might think it's innocent. But, the underlying message is clear - they would rather play the video game, which is fun, then take care of even basic responsibilities, such as brushing their teeth. A couple, husband and wife, were indicted and tried and convicted, because they played a video game for so long, that they did not feed their child. The child died.

If you are that gamer, ask yourself - " is there something I am avoiding doing?" And, if your child is that gamer, realize that perhaps that he is avoiding doing something.

Ultimately the lazy person is not happy about something. His escapism is derived from an unwillingness to face some activity that he thinks is best avoided at all cost. Understand one thing though, being unwilling to do something sherely on the basis of avoiding doing work, versus an equivalent activity are two different things.

Let me explain. Let's say you have a list of household chores. Let's say you or your child avoids one of those chores, but might even complete all the other chores instead of that one, that is not laziness. That is simply you or your child does not like that chore. You might have another child that likes that chore versus all the rest. Try to understand what it is, you or your child dislikes about that chore. Do not beat yourself up, nor badger your child about that chore, unless that chore simply has to be done: like taking out the trash. At that point, you or your child has to grin and bare it. Avoiding all chores is simply laziness.

Let's go back to the husband avoiding talking about the marriage. What if he wasn't a talker? Then, it is the wife's fault for marrying him, if she requires him to talk to her. She is being just as lazy as he is, if she doesn't approach him. And, if that's the case, they deserve each other, or they deserve the stigma of walking around being a divorcé.

So just because someone does "something", does not mean they are not lazy. The question is "are they doing what they ought to be doing." It could be as complex as doing their job more in order to avoid simply talking to your spouse, or as simple as sitting on the couch instead of doing chores. They are both lazy.

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