Monday, May 17, 2010

Kathy Griffith and the D List

Unfunny, Unattractive and Obvious, and Those are Kathy Griffin's Good Qualities

So a new neighbor moved into the complex, white guy, single and of course homosexual. [ just sayin facts ] He's loud, boisterous and broke. I lent him a power chord the fist day I met. Hey, I'm a nice guy. Wanna fight about it? So invariably, this loud, boisterous, chubby, gay guy likes to talk about rather serious subjects. And, he asks me my opinions. Now I've been knowing this guy for all of 5 days. Invariably he gets upset at my answers.

Oh, wait, I bet you think I'm saying I'm anti-gay or homophobic or something crazy like that. No, no and no! I give him my opinion on what adults should really be looking at, and how they should see things.

For instance, he has the Avatar DVD. He is into all this "metaphysical" stuff, which he likes to talk about constantly, and knows nothing about. [but I never said anything to him about that, so don't think I'm rude] So he goes on about the world tree and how Avatar was a movie about metaphysical things. He then turns to me and asks me what I thought about Avatar the movie. You know me. I turned to him and said "I'll tell you what it's about in 2 sentences, but are you prepared to listen?" "SURE!" he says. So I say, "Avatar is a military propaganda movie that makes little wet teenage boys go sign up for the Army and get murdered in Iraq and Afghanistan, murdering mothers and children in the street, with or without orders from superior officers." Somehow he didn't like that answer. He goes off on "didn't you see the world tree?" To which I reply, "dude you're 30 years old, you don't know that when you see a movie there's the obvious things that are shown in front of your face, but equally obvious is the message tucked just under the cover. It's why little girls go see my little pony over and over. It's why wet behind the ears young men go see Hurt Locker. Neither group has to think very much to get what the movie is really about, making them feel safe, but putting pictures in front of their faces that teaches them that killing is ok and a girl's place is stomp on men's testicles. Hello UNDERWORLD the movie."

So he changed the subject.

Next he goes into his Kathy Griffin, Giffith, Gifford.. whatever her no-talent name is, impersonation. He does the voice of everyone in the show. I don't watch T.V. so I have to guess at who is who, doing what to whom. Then he says, "Kathy Griffin is for gay marriage." And, I say, of course, "OH REALLY?" "Yes," he says. "She is parked right in Washington until they approve gay marriage." I sigh and say, "Kathy Griffin is not gay. She is not for gay marriage. She is just a wannabe that is doing something to get her name out there." He goes into a tirade about how she is fighting for "our" [his] rights to get married. I say, "she is no more for gay rights than that Matt Damon character who is playing Mr. Smith on your movie right now. She's an actress and could care less if you get married or not. She's pandering to gay people, because they pay the duckets to come see her show, and watch her religiously on Bravo."

At that, he asked me to leave his house.

I walked home thinking, is this why congress and the senators are just running roughshod all over us? We're a country full of babies who can't handle the truth, even when that truth is as plain as the nose on our face?

I don't personally know Kathy Griffin, admittedly. But, I'd be willing to bet my jockey shorts that she is exactly as I described above. She is in it for the money. Let's say her fan base is 55% gay. What else is she going to do, but come out for gay marriage?

Let's look back at another starlette. Donna Summer, the disco queen, HATED gay people, or so I've heard. It wasn't until a manager crunched the numbers and showed her how much they bought her records FOR YEARS, that she all of a sudden changed her mind and said she loved them. Awww, happy ending, awwww. I mean really. Grown men, gay or not, fell for that?

So back to my grown, 31 year old [today was his b-day] neighbor. So I told him what I consider the truth. Now, you know I told him to research it. He wouldn't have anything to do with it. He doesn't even want to know if she's lying or telling the truth.

He goes on and on raving about how wonderful she is, and that she parades her alcoholic drunk mother on national t.v. I say, "is that how she wants to achieve fame? By shaming her mother on national T.V.? By making her family name dirt? How horrible is that?" I don't get it. Who claps while their 92 year old drunk mom pukes on the floor while cameras are rolling?

And, this 32 year old thinks this is the height of comedy and coolness. Have I walked off into the land of stupid? Is this country really that depraved? REALLY?

It's no wonder he got mad and kicked me out of his apartment. He thinks drunk 90 yr old women are cool.

Now watch, when I go over there and yank MY power chord out of his computer he's gonna be a sad panda. And, I'll think nothing of it. I'll plop it right in the box where I had it and keep on typing.

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