Black Girl You're Doing it Wrong
Pay a million dollars for a sick beat, get a catchy hook and then lay down the most F*ed up lyrics talking about how a Black man is a douchebag, and you have a national hit. You will be sure it will go to the #1 spot in no time. Is there something to these songs? Where are these songs coming from? Are there Black men out there, just breaking Black women's heart after heart? Where are these casanovas? The answer is, there are none. There is no mass Black man heart-breaking club. Oh, I'm sure there are some male Black gigolos out there, don't get me wrong, but there is no lonely-heart club out there for Black men. So where do these songs come from?
They come from music producers hell-bent on trying to bring the Black man down. And, you buy it.
But, this article isn't about retarded folk who make retarded music and the retarded folk that buy it. This article is about how YOU can assure yourself that you are not going to end up with a scrub.
Lesson One: How Not to Date a Scrub
Yes, this article is directed at women. Apparently, since I am not a father of a daughter, I always feel the need to be an internet dad to young / or not so young ladies. All my cousins are married, so I feel the need to protect some other young lady from evil men. HAHAHAHA!!! Internet dad to the rescue****
So anyway. Before we get into dating / marrying a good Black man, let's talk about you first. A man does not define you. You should not let a man define you. You are your own person. You have your own tastes, likes and dislikes. You should have your own source of income. If you go to a club, you should be able to afford the entire night by yourself, i.e. buying your own drinks. There is nothing more annoying than a woman that comes up to me asking me to buy her a drink. I'm not a charity fund. All this talk about being an independent woman goes out the window when you cannot afford your own room and board.
How not to date a scrub. First of all, if you want to catch a Black man who doesn't have to worry about can he afford the dollar menu, you need to step up your own game. Stop going to clubs to pick up the man of your dreams. Really? Did ya think that would work? And, if you just have to go to a club, and you're hell bent on picking up the man of your dreams, go to a club with a steep cover charge.
Here's the theory about the club with a cover charge. The owner gambles that if he charges a cover, it will keep the "riff raff" out of the club. It makes the club more exclusive. So if you go to such a club, you hedge your bets that you will not run into "riff raff".
The same theory can be applied to landing a good Black man. If you want to catch a non-riff-raff Black man, then you should go where riff raff do not and cannot go.
Attend Events: Every town / city caters to their upper echelon type of citizens. You simply then read where these events are held. Expect to pay money if you're going to attend these.
Join Clubs: Due paying clubs are everywhere. You can rest assured that if you go to an even sponsored by a club, that more than likely any Black man there is more than likely not worried around the dollar menu.
Politics: Getting involved in your political party [you're a libertarian right?] is another great way to meet a non-"riff raff" Black man. More than likely a Black man that is involved in a political campaign is probably not a street thug. Now understand that going to a political rally, does not mean you are politically involved. I am talking about fund raising events or even joining a campaign. These are the people you want to meet, not the street rally.
Don't Find a Black Man in Church: 50% of the people in church do not want to be in church. It's probably closer to 75%, but I'm wagering conservatively. That being said, you have an over 50% chance that the guy you run into at church is not going to look out for your best interest or selflessly give of himself, to you. People find themselves sitting in a church for many strange reasons. Also, church doesn't discriminate. Anyone can walk into a church. And, the bottom line is, you don't want to date / marry just anyone.
For those who are saying to themselves that "just because a Black man has money, doesn't mean he's a great guy." You are delusional. I am sure there are some great guy, poor, Black men out there. But, being a great guy, super sexy, and muscular does not pay bills. So much misery comes from just being poor in America. And if you do not realize this, you are sticking your head in the sand and pretending otherwise. At the end of the day, you want a Black man that can provide for himself and for you, if need be. I personally would have you date / marry someone that can provide for you, not that you absolutely need it, but when you get married and have children, you want to stay home with the kids, for their sake.
A lot of Black folks do not plan their life out. They don't sit down and ask themselves what they want out of life and where do they see things going. At the very least, I would have you plan who you are going to date. I would have you put yourself in the position to find someone with some get-up-and-go. I would have you open yourself up to options of a great selection of Black men and not the ones that these fake songs talk about: Scrubs.
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